Hi Mutley, So, here you are posting in the Poetry Forum. Always good to see a post but maybe start/resurect one of your old threads in My Journal. Lok at the advice you have had previously. Get back to what has helped in the past.
I may have said this before but the trick to not having to keep coming back here is to not leave – use support to maintain your recovery, not just when in the ****. I look forward to hearing your positive steps in My Journal.