Mindset

If I were to gamble tomorrow
I would have to start planning today
Arrange to have funds on the ready
(Where there is a will, there’s a way!)
I would need to devise a tall story
To cover my tracks for a while
To reach the nearest casino
Involves travelling many a mile

Yes, if I were to gamble tomorrow,
I would need to have started last week
To give seven days notice for savings
That are “tied up”…or else , I could speak
To a “soft touch” friend cum enabler
Who was conned and deceived in the past
And concoct some believable drama
To convince them I need money fast.

Every time in the past when I gambled
I always planned well in advance
I needed time, money and access
(Gambling never happens by chance)
What many CGs call a “slip”
For me was more like a “plan”
I would plot and manoeuvre in secret
To remove every barrier or “ban”
The devious scheme would develop
In my mind for nights and for days
Resulting in an obsessive intention-
To conjure up new gambling ways.

Today my thought process is different.
I refuse to call gambling a “slip”
If ever I choose to gamble
I know I will quickly lose grip
Of every bit of reality
That the last twenty months have restored
So planning to gamble tomorrow
In my mindset will never be stored.