Awake

 
I watch two friends
They smile and laugh
I envy them
As they walk past
Their laughter effortless
Their exchange so open
They’re comfortable
Not yet broken
My family and friends
They know not me
Too many secrets
Are mine to keep
Some I keep from shame
Some I keep from fear
Some I can’t admit to
Oh how did I get here?
This is me
Make no mistake
I’m no longer sleeping
I am awake
I cannot change it
The past is done
The choice is mine
To stay or run