The following poem may not be directly related to recovery, but it is related to one of the factors that allowed this addiction to take hold of my life; and the care that I speak of below is the same care that I find in the people here, some that speak in different languages and are from different lands.
My putting off getting care for a depression that was growing, and that this event that added to it, is what sent be off into an uncontrollable frizzy few ears later when I just could take anymore. At that time I had had enough of living in a depressed state everyday, but instead of doing something about it, I tried to bury the feeling of not being able to take anymore in a great drain on my life. A drain that took a few more years of added problems and feeling of despair for me to say enough again, and this time I mead a turn in the right direction.
But the memories of ‘That Day’ still both haunt me and remind me of the love that was given to me by strangers, strangers in a my then home-away-from-home in France, people that I could not even understand, but was able to feel their love during the actual moments of building crumbling and lives being lost. Written a not-so-long-time after 9/11/2001
Je suis désolé, je suis désolé, je suis désolé mon ami.
What are these people talking about, what do they feel?
It happened only moments ago yet they offer sympathy.
I see my fear as shown in other helplessness faces being so real .
I hear my pain echoed in words that are strange to me.
"I am sorry, I am sorry, I am sorry my friend". Time has stopped, but the events live on filling the air,
Showing the world the hate that evolved in some way,
Showing destruction and killing that came without care.
Changing the world, changing me, changing all on "That Day". These strangers, people I don’t know, have never met,
They’re reaching out, surrounding me with love as I am walking home;
And others that I do know are showing the same compassion,
People being people. Life being life; C’est la vie! Larry, paul315; 315 being my address at the time.
— 9/11/2012 6:26:29 PM: post edited by paul315.